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Sales Training for Engineers Sales Training specifically for Engineers, Scientists & Techies Courses, Workshops and Manuals by Robert Seviour |
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Engineer
Jokes
Humour for the scientific mind An actual question
given on a University of
Toronto chemistry
mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor
shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we
now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. Bonus Question:
Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the
students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it
expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student,
however, wrote the following: First, we need to
know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate
at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which
they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not
leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many
souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that
exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one
of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one
religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and
death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase
exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in
Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately
as souls are added. This gives two
possibilities: 1. If Hell is
expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the
ttemperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is
expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the
temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the
postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be
a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into
account the fact
that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I
am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The
corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it
is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving
only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine
being which
explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God." This
student received the only A. |
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